Golflogic.ca

I went to a pitch and putt course this summer and found the maintenance crews were still on strike and the greens dry as a bone. The crews encouraged me to cross the picket line for free, so I played the nearly deserted course where the earth was cracked and the normally trimmed grass was left ragged. I really enjoyed myself. I felt like I was playing a US Open. The balls bounced off the green. Putts went sideways. It was a different game and it reminded me of the pitch and putt I played as a youth in Colorado, where they say the ground is as hard and dry as a “banker’s heart”.

Do we really need imported grasses? What if we didn’t need to keep weeds at bay and left the course to over-grow itself? A golf course is un-natural when it is pristine. The vegetation requires vast amounts of petro-based chemicals to make the greens greener. Grasses unknown to the region are imported and planted at great cost, requiring massive water support. Toxic chemicals are used to rid the area of weeds. A flowering banquet of other native plants are often ripped up and tossed because they don’t meet the esthetics of course designers and club members. Trees that do not support the style of the golf administrators are cut down, illustrated at the 2007 U.S. Open at Oakmont in Pennsylvania, where some 500 native trees were toppled for the tournament. And in some cases, nature gets in the way and has to be removed with sad results for wildlife. (See ‘Red Tail Hawks’ — “As It Lies more…

A quick thanks to good buddy Colin McDougall from Thunderball for this guest post.  Great article and check out his new web site HERE

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Tell the truth. I know it’s hard to admit it out loud but you’re among friends here. You’re living a lie aren’t you? The kind of lie that keeps you among the ‘acceptable’ at your club. A lie that continues to stay buried within you, eating at you, making you more and more uncomfortable with every passing day until you absolutely have to let it out and tell the world know your dark secret. And just what is that Secret?

You only like to hit your driver. You only want to hit your driver.

“You should practice at least half the time on shots from 100 yards and in.” This is the mantra of every golf instructor there has ever been…..and you know what? They’re right. If you want to shoot lower scores, by all means, strap the tempo music on and chip and putt and chip and putt and chip and putt ‘til you are able to channel Seve McMickle-Pelz whenever you need to.

But, you don’t do that, do you? When you get to the range, it’s a few warm up shots with a wedge, a few more with the 7-iron, maybe one or two with the 5-iron before you get to the real reason you’re there, the reason your practice sessions actually wear you out physically, the reason your hands look like you were training a prize fighter to hit them…. without the protective gloves on.

The Driver.

Is there is a better feeling than swinging a driver as hard as you can, transferring all your power to that ball? Is there a better sound than hearing the ball erupt off the clubface and pierce the sky like the death strike of a Ninja? Is there a better sight than watching that ball hurtling to its final, laws of physics defying final resting place? Is there a better smell than the odor of defeat on your playing partners whose manhood you just shrunk in half?

I think no.

Power-Driving. There, I said it. Power-Driving is the future for you and those like you. Power-Driving is testosterone and testosterone is Power-Driving.

No more shame in wanting to bring only one club to the range. No more ‘drive for show, putt for dough’ crap from those distance starved doorknobs of the ‘game’. No more homoerotic Yanni music draining every ounce of my manhood when I’m watching yet another yawn-fest on the PGA Tour. Most of all, NO MORE GOD DAMN PUTTING!

The revolution is coming, get your big club out and join us.

Saw this on Will it Blend…

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